A Mother’s Heart Pt 2 – (pondering)

IMG_0124.JPG“All because two fell in love” has a different meaning right now.   Today is Valentine’s Day and as you already know Darwin is the love of my life, my valentine.  We fell in love, got married, had a beautiful daughter, had a handsome son.   They grew up to be two amazing adults who we are super proud of.  Then Ashley met the love of her life and gave us another son to love and had two beautiful granddaughters.  Dustin met the love of his life and gave us another daughter to love.  Two (Darwin and I) blossomed into a family of 8.

It is 4:17am and I am awake, you might be asking why?  Heavy heart as a Mom.  My husband and children are my life and my love for Christ is my breath.  The compassionate love that Christ gave on the cross is the open gate to the promise and hope I have as I am awake praying for Ashley.  I believe at times God wakes us up to pray, to talk to Him, to pour out to him all the things we have held a strong face to all day.  The bravery, on the outside during the day at times melts to a pouring of a broken heart in the night.  Tonight is one of those nights.

Jeremiah 31 25 (1).jpgI fell in love, married, gave birth and raised children not ever expecting I would see one of my kids going through what she is facing right now.  We have traveled many a journey over the years with our kids, Jesus and I.  Many nights awake praying, just like tonight.  The “rubber his the road” in faith at times like this.  Believing in God and loving Him can’t be just done on a Sunday morning, although, that is a sweet refreshing time too.  Believing and trusting has to be in times when the clouds are thick, the weight is heavy and the heart is torn. Can you sense my heart is torn tonight?  Yeah, your right.  But…

I am choosing to be strong in my faith in Christ as my Saviour.  I am choosing to hold on to believing that Ashley will be better sooner rather than later.  I am choosing to believe that there will be good come out of this time and in time we will see the ways God will use this time to bring praise to himself.  Those choices are not because of any strength in me, believe me my strength is gone, I’m tired.  Those choices are based on the Christ who has walked so much with me, He is my first love.  Tonight I am praying and pleading and filling my bucket with hope in the one who sees it all.pexels-photo-235941.jpeg

God is good.   I keep saying that over and over again, even in times where my tears just can’t help but fall from my eyes.   The two that fell in love in this story, Darwin and I have felt years of blessing in the family we have, all 8 of us…. oh what a blessing!   “All because two fell in love”

I am asking once again for prayer for Ashley as she faces further procedures, tests, doctors and time healing.  Thank you for reading through this and for your prayers, support and help along the way.   Happy Valentines Day to you.

Hugs n’ Prayers

Jackie

One Comment Add yours

  1. lorena kehler says:

    We do pray for Ashley.

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