For those of you that follow me I hope that you will indulge me writing on my Mom for a while. My Mom and I were very close in heart and I miss her desperately. I know of a few friends around me that are in the grieving process too, and others that have waded their way to the place that time has capsulized the grief into pockets of wonderful healing memories. Grief is after all a process.
I have been contemplating some of the things my Mom has said to me over the years and you know, most of it has been around her sharing bible verses, motherly wisdom, sharing why she loves this or that and her love of old hymns. As part of my healing through this great hole that is in my life right now, I thought that I would honor her and the Saviour she loves so much by sharing some of her words of wisdom. It is a written reminder to me, and to introduce you to who my Mom was here on earth and is now being in heaven.
My Mom and Dad went on a cruise to Alaska many years ago for their 50th wedding anniversary. ( side note: they were married 77 1/2 years the day Mom went to be with Jesus) . Mom was pretty nervous about the cruise but yet excited. When they arrived to where the Glaciers are the ship stopped for a while and Mom said she was overwhelmed with a verse she had read around that time in her devotions. At that time in life there was a lot going on and a lot of stress in her life. As she stood watching the glaciers calving she was struck with this verse:
Psalm 46:10 . “He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”
She said she felt like she was in that moment alone on the ship watching nature that was created by God unfold. That God wants us to stand still in knowing He is with us through everything and that no matter what He will carry us through even the toughest of times. She shared that story with me a lot over the years, but little did I know that this verse would be what I would cling to in having to say “see ya later” to her, my Mom.
I am thankful for the relationship we had and that there was times throughout my life that Mom would share the nuggets of wisdom she would glean from the Bible with me. I am thankful to God for His word and for the comfort in my own devotions over the years, but right now I am clinging to the ones Mom shared.
I am grieving and thinking and processing a lot right now. What I believe, why I believe what I do, my mortality and that of those around me. The ache to talk to Mom drives many of my tears to the surface and then I am reminded, Mom would tell me that Jesus is the one that meets us in our deepest sorrow and that it was Him who met her as a little girl when she had to try to understand why her mother had passed away, Mom was only 5. Often times she would tell me that it is in the standing still that we hear God the loudest. When we are still, she would say, is when we are not trying to take control and we are trusting that God is at work. Yes there are many times we are prompted by the Holy Spirit to be involved, but then there are times we are to just be still…. sorrow is one of those times.
To be still before Him and giving the pain to Him to sooth with His love, His word and the Holy Spirit is what I need to do. Sometimes I am ok, other times the grief is overwhelming. Today as I sit here I am celebrating my Mom and the amazing wise, humble lady she was and know that in this moment she is with her Mom in the presence of the Lord they love so much. My grief is for my Dad, for me and for our family in missing Mom but we are all so excited to know that the next time we see her will be forever…no more good byes.
If you are grieving and struggling through this time, please send me an email or leave a comment below and I would be so glad to pray for you as you work through this time as well. It would be my pleasure to pray for you.
Hugs n’ Prayers